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About Me soulcheeky. Based in sunny island. Star sign-Cancerian. Contact me: Soul-cheeky What do I write? Random events, thoughts & remarks based on fragments of the writer's life experiences & ccurrences. Not meant to be offensive or imposing but just a way of life. Feel free to drop me a note if you're impressed or distressed (by my posts). Archives
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Tuesday, October 18, 2005 Advice from Oprah about men ~If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better". You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man's behaviour. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less. Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street. You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary. Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him- he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others. They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them. Like many things & advice, it's always easier said than done. Fate is a funny thing. Sometimes you think you can live without love, but deep down you know you can't. So far, I have yet to meet anyone who tell me they don't need someone special to love them. Some have been searching for the One all their life. The more you look, the more that special someone won't appear. Love...it can show up at your door when you least expect it. Some lucky ones, just had it mapped out for them. There are no prince / princess charming. No one is perfect. We just have to live with each other flaws....provided they are bearable. Life's too full of surprises. So it's either you live with it or you walk away with it. Pain....its a process of growing up & learning. Love...it can be so beautiful. And they don't say "love is blind" for nothing. |
